Exquisite Corpse

the wonders that two or three pervertied imaginations can come up with. these were written by me and my roomate and two of them also featured a friend of ours. my sections are written in purple, my roomates in green, and our friends in black.

Once a fat kitty named Chloe had cornered a helpless walrus who fought savagely to preserve his blind, one eyed grandfather who wasted all of the family's money on repairing an old boot, on which he inscribed, "To whom it may concern, my father, who might be coming for dinner, leaving what was left of his penis bundled up in an old lace napkin. It had blood on it, or perhaps liquer. He strode across the room to pick it up off of the coffee table where stained cigarrette butts still smouldered causing the reek of menstrual flooding. the lesbians stampeded.

2:
There were only three monkeys left. One of them had extra nipples. the other two had their own odd quirks too: a disconcerting interest in bodily functions, and an almost obscene fascination with onomotopoetic noises from under the vulva. A lone machine sauntered up to pile of used rubber tires and tried to violently abuse it. it didnt matter really because it had been through so many disgraceful transformations and humiliating reenacting of almost forgotten lullabies written by faggots of old. the creature yawned and scratched his penis with a rusty nail. he attacked a fly with a rancid slab of jerky. The fly was so used to being in the laughable situation of fighting cocks. a tentacle sneaked out, lashing at a tumbling bottle of running rum. ice spread as night fell, causing a fiery cataract of eyeballs, watery mucous and clotted effluvium of indescribable and noxious perfume of the elderly, gay woman named Batson. as the sun rose five pigeons burst into flame, and that was that, or so they say.

3...
Mort and his brother Tod had a special secret, that no one knew but them, and they were proud to keep it. they had it bronzed, framed, and displayed with a list of homosexual alibies. once they had discussed their penis sizes, they set off. so with so many differant places that had never been heard of, how could anything be more mundane? never again would peanuts be considered friendly. after the chicken rampage, feathers, blood and wrinkled money left a trail clearly indicating the hiding place of said goats. he kicked out, blindely searching for flesh. eating maggots. why was it so hard? they could not stop wondering why the bitches had been so intransigent? only a dog ever saw him again. his questioner.


4...
lights flickered as a sheet of metal slid to the floor and into the chasm, causing a spleen to slice in two. hardly had this taken place when a ship crashed into a submerged rock causing all onboard to flagulate pickled calimari. After causing such atrocity, everyone decided to react most logically by attacking the platypus. he decided on the orbiting goose as his plane of choice and responded accordingly, carressing the purring candlestick with blistered fingers. and waiting for the noisy sister to cease menstruation and light her twatty pantyhose aflame. this eruption increased the rate of global warming, caused nuns to grow horns and then chop them off in penance. hopscotch and scotch-scotch being the other forms. three guppies lept out of the primordial soup-pool with guns ablaze, a wild expression and strap-on goat horns as if a devil had propositioned a penguin in a stunning fashion creating numerous sequin studded penis' crimp-ons. the swarms of horned bees ran to the dark oriface that made a home to all the eighth graders that wanted to learn how to pilot a tank.


5...
and so it was, et tu brute and so on...the hobbits and luck dragons alike did celebrate gayly with piniatas, peroshky. But all this delightful celebration turned to small erotic playtime. lips parted in short expectance of Tang (R) free daffodils, escaped from the government prisons, prayed to the venerable man-man. whipped into a gender-nonspecific frenzy of genital mutilation and hyper-drag costumes that deny all cognitive think ideals. this in turn blew the suffy minds of toddler degenerates. they then asked, "what kind of venereal disease is that?" they responded, "paper cut." a snake slid forward, sloping down into yet another dilerious state. after the brainwashing attempts had clearly failed, they resorted to more traditional and brutal circumsition, stimulating the zyphoid process. all were merry playing russion roulette and eating glass candy meanwhile spreading salt over his foreskin. he pondered the sweat that rolled up instead of down his legs, and froze when he saw what he thought were tiny bugs all over the nipples of the horses but actually they were spotted steaming poop sacks screaming "revoloution!"